The love that makes it hard to breathe
by Kaila Azroth
Summary: Love is a torrid thing it's what makes people do the unthinkable. Hinata and her lovely despair that involves Sasuke. Life may be cruel but having your love leave is more than cruel. It's wicked and sick. Ask Hinata she knows it. Besides this is her sto


**I wrote this when I was angry a week earlier from now. I was upset because I couldn't go on the laptop and that my lil bro was hogging it all to himself. I know I'm 16 but I can still throw a tantrum if I want and I was really angry and whenever I'm angry I think. Well more like daydream and the poor sucker I was daydreaming about was Hinata.**_  
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**But really I was thinking of Sasuke being a bastard and how I wanted to make him suffer.**

**This is a one-shot and ugh please don't kill me and just enjoy, cry, be angry or whatever. **

**I hate it when I get angry because somebody has to suffer.**

**Which usually involve fictional characters and not real live walking flesh.**

**Ah well read and tell me what you guys think.**

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><p><strong>The love that makes it hard to breathe is all I ever need<strong>_  
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_I always thought he loved me..._

_But the way things have led up to now is contradicting that thought. _

_I thought...that we would always be together from the times we spent together in our childhood days to the days that brought about our adolescents and to realize our feelings for each other. The way he hugged me and smiled that grateful smile saying those sweet words that has never left me throughout the years that has come by us._

"_I love you Hinata. I love you so much." _

_The way he cried tears of joy even though he was vainly trying to hide it made me cry a little myself at our Wedding._

_I never knew he could stop...love...loving me._

_But now that we're here in the present it isn't like before. The days stretch out to me in a cold and shallow embrace accompanying me in this cold and quiet mansion that houses nothing but my love for him. Only thing missing is the embodiment of my love. _

_It's strange how my heart is eating away by the hours that turn to day._

_How every night we sleep; we never touch only leaving me to silently weep._

_The look on his face holding no interest leaving me in distress_

_The hallow hole that is building only grows more when he's leaving_

_The distance that's working its way up to me by the work he does overseas_

_The look of nothing in his eyes and the blank smile makes its tear inside of me_

_I'm holding on to what is left and won't allow the thought of our love to despair because it's going to leave me bereft_

_With nothing else but my heart out on the line I can only wait blindly in the dark embers of our home that is nothing but a block of expensive wood._

_Every night he comes home with...smells of different perfume_

_I smile to hide the pang that wrings my heart so_

_I can't allow myself to be left for misery to consume_

_But even as I stand there welcoming him come does he even want me to_

_I'm crying now he doesn't see because he isn't here but I'm crying now_

_We haven't spoken to each other and somehow the distance is welling up with loneliness_

_He looks away in disinterest and I wonder how cold he has gotten to be so...foul_

_My thoughts stops as that image wisps away and I bawl my tears out of me and my emptiness_

_Today's a sunny day as I walk onto the village bridge_

_The sun is blossoming the purple skies as I stop in the middle of the man-made bridge._

_It's so beautiful._

_I haven't walked out of the Mansion for months and here I am looking out to the sky and breathing in the cool and chilly air. The wind caresses my cheeks and I close my eyes in comfort. _

_Feeling the loneliness more than ever than before I let out a tear to crawl down my cheek, but then streaks of tears follow suit and I find myself standing on a bridge as tears swept their way passes my closed lids._

_Opening my eyes as silence pass I see below me the rushing river with the dangerous rocks below. How quaint, to have the river be accompanied by the rocks to forever stay by their side. How wonderful to have the knowledge of having to know someone is next to you forever and never leave your side to forever that is your love. The tears start up again. _

_Wiping them gently away I get up and stand astride the bridges red rails. The wind bellows my hair and skirt, making my matching blue shirt tightened against my skin, I open my arms and smile at the view standing gloriously before me._

_I'm scared. So afraid and so scared of what's happening to me and my love._

_My heart is breaking bit by bit my throat is sledged with something that makes it hard to breathe sometimes._

_The ache in me is overwhelmingly painful to ignore and I cry when I'm asleep._

_But he doesn't do anything at all._

_Am I dying in this world of life?_

_Am I dying by the clear tears raining down my cheeks, my body crying?_

_Is this how I'm to live now that I'm all alone?_

_**But I can't give up!**_

_How many times have I said those words in my heart?_

_**But I can't give up!**_

_Those words that have been keeping me up seem too weak now._

_**But I can't give up!**_

_Their purpose is sliding away from me letting the cold seep into my heart._

_But I can't give up!_

_Somebody...tell me what do I do now?_

_Suddenly my ears pick up the noise of a giggling woman and a grunting man making their way up to the bridge. By the sounds of the giggling woman you could tell that she was happy. Her laugh was something that matched with the calming and cheerful scenery. I wonder how happy her life will be now that she's with the one who she loves._

_The sounds of their footsteps come closer, the woman still laughing._

_I want to see them. _

_I want to see the one thing I'm never going to have in my entire life, now that I'm about to end my life here at this welcoming bridge._

_Their footsteps stopped and I hear the woman say something about a kiss._

_That's when I open my eyes and look._

_The breath comes out in a choked gasp. _

_My life stops and my heart finally falls to oblivion._

_The hallow despair in me finally erupts loudly, drowning out all the air of life, as it consumes me entirely._

_The tears break free faster and a sob racks up and breaks into the silent air._

_My body quivers in shock and my brain can't stop me from looking at the couple kissing there in front of me._

_Stop!_

_Stop!_

_No don't oh please don't!_

_Please!_

_Don't!_

_I don't want to see this!_

_It can't be happening!_

_**Oh please have mercy on me and stop Sasuke!**_

_But my unheard pleas don't reach him until a sound makes them stop._

_My crying._

_Slowly his dazed eyes filled with happiness...something I haven't seen in so long...looks away from the woman in his arms and...up at me._

_My stomach goes warm and the pains I feel is so much worse now that I know that this isn't some kind of sick dream by the way his eyes grow wide with shock._

_My stomach tightens in a hot coil and I gasp as my tears don't seem to stop._

_The air is gone and I feel nothing but the coldness that is my empty body._

_I feel the tight hot air in my stomach that goes by the name of shame._

_Hot and cold clash together and I let myself finally break free from those onyx eyes that I have loved for so long._

_I let go of the feeling of being there for him._

_He seems much happier that way._

_I let go of the false hope of him loving me back._

_He seems to find love in another._

_I let go of ever being welcomed in his arms so full of warmth._

_He seems preoccupied doing that to someone else._

_I let go..._

_...of everything._

_My lips curled in a smile telling him how much I loved him, how much pain I was going through from that kiss he seemed to enjoy._

_His cry of my name is lost to me as my body plunges through the rushing air and descends to the river full of rocks. _

_All throughout those years I never knew I was being...abandoned by the one I loved._

_I can't believe that I caused him to be like that._

_I hate myself for letting him to be alone._

_I wished he'd tell me earlier that he didn't love me._

_I would've killed myself sooner._

_But he didn't._

_He let me suffer as I did so to him._

_Again, I wonder how this came to be._

_My head hits the sharp edge of the rock and that's all it takes for me to slip away from life and into the black oblivion of death._

**Life is my own way of living and knows this...not everyone lives that way...because of what we go through every day we deem it necessary to follow what it is to fit in...how stupid are we in this area of sense...how foolish to live your life set in stones and not live it the way the wind blows.**

_Hm. I seem lighter somehow but the pain is still lingering there with me._

_Am I not dead?_

_Oh wait something is pulling me._

_I pull up my eyes and see...the yellow sunshine brightly glaring at me._

_Where am I?_

_**Hinata. **_

_I crane my neck to the voice but there isn't anything around me except the grassland and white sky above me._

_Again I ask where I am._

_**Hinata Hyuuga.**_

_The voice sounds male...concerned but filled with so much life and wonder that I answer nonetheless even though I don't know where the male is._

_He sighs, relieved I guess._

_I wonder why._

_Sudden images of Sasuke come back but I repress it with my bitten cries._

_**Hinata Hyuuga. You weren't meant to die. You're blood made a pact and therefore you are immortal. We cannot allow your kind to be graced with the Gates of Death. You cannot be allowed to be graced with the eternal comfort of Death you seek so much with your broken soul. We apologise but you may not pass.**_

_Oh. _

_A sudden wail escapes me and that's when I know that misery was something that wasn't going to go away soon._

_Why am I to live when so many others are allowed to die?_

_Why is this cruel joke being played on me and why oh just why is this happening to me?_

_I want to die._

_Plain and simple._

_To live away a life away from onyx eyes that are the cause of my shattered soul._

_I don't want to live anymore._

_I want this tight coil bubbling with heat to rip me to shreds and to leave me desolated with nothing but loneliness._

_Loneliness is the only thing to be with me forever willingly without a shred of remorse or resentment._

_But if I go back I'm going to be back where I was not a moment ago. _

_I don't want that!_

_Please don't make me go back there!_

_Don't let me see his face!_

_I don't...I don't..._

_A sudden white aura feels me and I squint my eyes as tears roll down._

_Hinata! Hinata! Hinata!_

_No...Please no...Don't let him come near me!_

_Please oh please no please don't let him be near me!_

_Get him away!_

_Away!_

_Please!_

_Hinata! Hinata! Please answer me! HINATA!_

_No, no, no, no, NO!_

_I don't want to answer. I don't want to be here! I don't want to be anywhere near you! Please! _

_Please!_

_LEAVE ME ALONE!_

Hinata finally opens her eyes and she can see the white ceiling, the white nurse-outfits and the lack of white bed sheets. She feels something gripping her hand and her throat clenches tightly. She feels a hand caress her cheek but she flinches away from the touch and struggles her hand free from the grip. Murmurs fill the silence but she doesn't care. She shuts her eyes to bring back the black oblivion once again to be free of the building pain in her chest, but nothing happens.

"Hinata..." the voice sounds so broken and disbelief coated his voice. But she doesn't look back at the strangled voice. She doesn't let him see her face. She doesn't do anything for him to come closer. If he does she whimpers in fear and starts small squeamish screams that make it known that he's touches are not wanted. The nurses give worried glances towards each other and the couple but refrains Sasuke from touching the whimpering and shaking form of Hinata Hyuuga. She didn't consider herself an Uchiha no more. Not after what she went through to get here.

Suddenly the door opens and in walks in the father of Hinata Hyuuga. His eyes fall onto his wrecked daughter and he sends a glare full of anger to Sasuke, who is oblivious as he stares worriedly at his wife, before calling out to Hinata.

She opens her eyes and everyone but Sasuke can see the different colour of her eyes bleed bloody red and quiver in nothing but fear...and anger.

When she utters three toneless words it shocks them all to silence.

Her soft and gentle voice was changed and distorted...nothing but hate contorted her voice.

It also let him know that his oldest daughter, whom he hasn't seen for eight years, finally realised the one thing he and his whole family has been keeping secret from the world.

"I hate you."

It also let him know, by the bleeding eyes of his daughter, that she came back from Death only to be rebuked and now wanted to get away from the one thing that made her be like this pathetic state in the first place.

Sasuke Uchiha.

He glared at the man he let his daughter be taken away from him.

The man who held his daughter's love captive all for his own selfish self.

He glared hard.

But he was ignored.

Something had happened and he knew that by reading his daughter's face that he was going to help her in any way he can.

Looking back at her he asked her what she wanted.

She looked at him with loathe that made his heart clench and his stomach not sit well.

The image looked wrong.

Her eyes so filled with blood were nothing but red and her voice so harsh and broken steered clear of the loving, stuttering little girl he once had.

"The things that I've ever wanted in my entire life threw me away. There is nothing more I want but to feel loved. But he didn't love me at all. The one thing I wanted was death. But they threw me out because of my blood. Father what exactly do I want now that I have nothing to live for?"

His eyes looked fallen.

His heart thudded dangerously slow.

He was losing his daughter and he didn't know what to do about it.

Sasuke cried in anguish and held Hinata to him. Hinata began to cry in fear and crazed hate, thrashing her limbs away from the one thing that made her want something so dark and depressing. Her wails and violent thrashes were ignored as Sasuke held on tightly.

He didn't want to let Hinata go.

He didn't want to let her go. Period.

So a thrashing Hinata was not going to get the best of him, neither an angry looking old man that happened to be Hinata's Father.

"No. NO. I'm not letting you go Hinata, you hear me? I am not going to let you go!" he roared helplessly as he clutched Hinata's head and rocked them back and forth, but still, if more, Hinata thrashed with crazy vigour which made the nurses worry.

"Let me go! Let me go! Let me go! Let me go! LET. ME. GO!" Hinata's crazed wail and violent thrashes was held down by a distraught father. But still she writhed in the arms of her once-beloved. She didn't want to know why Sasuke wanted her anymore. He seemed so busy being distant to her to ever want her to be by his side.

She didn't want to know because some how she knew it was something to do with her death.

She cried harder.

She didn't want this and she certainly didn't want to be held by Sasuke. Not now and not ever. She was too broken to be held like this after the pain she just went through.

No.

"LET ME GO! LET ME GO! LET ME GO! LET ME GO! PLEASE LET ME GO! I DON'T WANT YOU! I DON'T WANT TO BE ANYWHERE NEAR YOU! JUST LET ME THE FUCK GO!" Her cries rang out throughout the Hospital and everyone flinched at the crazed tone the woman was emitting.

Hiashi had enough. He didn't want his oldest daughter to suffer like this so he let go, only to go around the metal table and punch the hell out of Sasuke. Sasuke knew he was coming and only tightened his hold on his wife.

That day she saw him kiss another woman made him stilled and shocked. He didn't believe that that was Hinata but he knew it was her by the way through her tears she smiled that smile so full of emotions. The dread he felt right then when he saw the woman he married and once loved when he was younger, to fall down in the river and hit her head directly at the sharp rock drew knives into his cold heart.

The day he felt his heart gutter in guilt.

That day when he said her name in a long time since their long period of silence.

But he didn't realize the importance of Hinata until he was graced with his home...so filled with nothing but furniture.

He thought she was dead and thought to move on with life.

But...something was wrong with the pangs in his heart.

The days that followed he saw images of Hinata smiling at him with all the love in the world.

He stayed home.

The more he let the quiet eat at him the more of the images of Hinata began to attack him.

Every day he left for work and every day he left her here.

Alone.

Cold.

The outings he had in the past were insignificant. The hell he caused her became more prominent. The cold and empty bed he slept in became more significant in its lack of warmth.

His heart was eating at him and he didn't know how the hell he came to be like this.

The love he left from Hinata was coming back ten times worse than what he felt when he was younger.

The love he killed was coming back with a vengeance.

He only realized this by the death of his wife.

No, that was wrong.

He realised his love for her when she smiled through those heart-breaking tears of hers when she caught him kissing one of his office girls.

It had been two months of hell and he didn't think that the hole he was feeling was going to go away.

That's when the call came.

He hadn't answered any of the calls but he didn't want to go through his older brother come crashing through the doors again.

So he answered.

Which was why he was here in the first place.

Seeing off his wife's remains before she'd go down under.

But the stark paleness of her skin made him stand in shock, before swiftly being at her side and shaking her.

Calling out her name uselessly.

As if it could bring back the dead to live again.

Which it did.

And now that he had her in his arms he wasn't going to let her go. Never in his life did he feel so happy, so filled with misery at the same time that he vowed that he was not going to let her get away from her.

Or else he'd feel the hell he went through those two months, but his heart clenched painfully when he thought again of what Hinata went through throughout the whole eight years spent together, and all because of him!

He was going to change that and no one was going to change that!

Not even his wife Hinata could stop him from loving her!

From giving her the one thing she so wanted and so greatly deserved!

He ignored the fact that maybe...just maybe...that it was all too late.

But if Hinata could come back from the dead so can the love he cruelly destroyed.

He was going to love her and show her how much he loved her and apologise every day for abandoning her by being by her side every day, be giving her all the love she craved before all this mess came undone, he'll do absolutely everything just so that he won't lose the one thing he so carelessly threw away without a thought.

"Hinata I'm sorry...I'm sorry. So very sorry...I'm so sorry Hinata. I'm so sorry...so sorry..." he was still rocking back and forth but he was crying. He didn't want to see his wife like this because of his touch. He couldn't give a shit about his image of being a proud Uchiha, his wife was in pain! And so was he. He continued to apologise through wet tears as he rocked back and forth and never once did he let go of Hinata.

A crazed and broken wife with eyes crazed with blood.

A weeping wreck of a husband with eyes so filled with onyx misery.

Holding unto the thrashing woman he loved.

The woman only wants nothing more but to be rid of this heartbreaking nightmare.

The helpless father with pale grey eyes stands and watches his daughter writhe crazily.

How deliciously poor the imagery of this scene can cause the pangs of pity from those who view this hideous display of love and heartbreak all woven into one beautiful and alluring tapestry for all to see.

Nothing more can be said of what happens next besides the fact that all the inhabitants of the Hospital were wiped of their memory.

But not even Sasuke could get his mind erased, for Uchiha's were resilient against anything, especially magic users such as the Hyuuga Clan.

This was why Hinata couldn't escape from Sasuke even as she tried so many countless times to be rid of the nightmare that was so real and so malicious in his delight to wrench her heart in so many directions.

_Broken to pieces_

_Hard press to escape_

_Living with the one you wanted to escape_

_Not being able to go near him_

_Life was so hard for Hinata she wanted so much to just die_

_But no one could grant her that wish_

_Absolutely no one_

_Not even Death itself._

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><p><strong>Teh End my buddies muahahaha<strong>

**So what did you guys think hmm?**

**Tell me.**

**K.A**

**P.S;** _I'm a twisted person I like making people suffer in my head but never the real culprit just my imaginative figments of people I claim to be my own, and not in the giving-birth-out-of-my-A-hole-crap but just my head...and what's inside it._

_-_-' _


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